I’ve loved this holiday for as long as I’ve known of it -and that’s going
on 3 years now – ever since Dave
Barry helped to publicize its existence in 2002. Each of the last 3 years
I’ve managed to miss it, but not this year. Oh no, me buckos, I’m on board
and ready for Talk Like a Pirate Day. My only regret is that me matey, Delegatrix,
will be north of the border, (in Canada, no less) and not around to share in
the sure to be lively and bawdy banter.
So, in honor of the upcoming holiday, which, just in case you missed it in the
title, is this Monday, September 19th, (Actually, it falls on September 19th every year, its just on a Monday this year) I share with you the:
Top Ten Pickup Lines for the Lady Pirates
the Official International Talk Like A Pirates
Day Web site
10. What are YOU doing here?
9. Is that a belayin’ pin in yer britches, or are ye … (this one is never
8. Come show me how ye bury yer treasure, lad!
7. So, tell me, why do they call ye, "Cap’n Feathersword?"
6. That’s quite a cutlass ye got thar, what ye need is a good scabbard!
5. Aye, I guarantee ye, I’ve had a twenty percent decrease in me "lice
4. I’ve crushed seventeen men’s skulls between me thighs!
3. C’mon, lad, shiver me timbers!
2. RAMMING SPEED!
…and the number one Female Pirate Pick-up Line:
1. You. Pants Off. Now!