Floridians in the cold

I can’t take any credit for this entry, other than knowing a good turn of phrase when I hear or read it. I received this in an email on November 14th, 2003, from a friend new to Florida. The best for me are the last 2 sentences.

“I see that it’s a balmy 44 degrees there. Yea, I guess when it really gets cold it’s Gortex weather. But heck it’s 65 here and it’s Gortex weather here –go figure. The people here could hardly drive in tee shirts and such when it’s warm. Now their bundled up to the neck, scarves that look like neck braces so they can’t turn their heads, and stocking caps that cover all but tiny eye slits, as though they were trying not to go snow blind in Antarctica.

I noticed that the traffic to the bathroom has increased as people have been drinking large sums of hot coffee as if they were in the slope side warming hut at lunch before going back outside in below zero temperatures to frolic and ski. But the biggest sign of all, is the absence of toes. What was yesterday the land of open toe’d shoes has now become that of covered warmth as the little piggies will now hibernate until the spring thaw.

A strange land indeed.”